Normal memory loss or something more? One caregiver’s journey to get answers

When Jack Lucas noticed changes in his wife Debbie’s memory, he tried to stay calm. People forget things. That’s just part of getting older, right?

But something didn’t feel right. The forgetfulness was subtle at first – misplaced items, repeated questions. Then it became harder to ignore, especially because Jack knew Debbie had a family history of Alzheimer’s.

That quiet question – what if it’s not just aging? – set Jack and Debbie on a path toward answers. It led them to Dr. Angel Lybbert, a geriatrician at Intermountain Health, and ultimately, to a rare diagnosis that changed everything.

Dr. Lybbert explains that while some forgetfulness is part of normal aging, there are signs that could indicate something more serious.

“Some minor lapses in forgetting the name of a person or thing or an appointment and later remembering them is a normal sign of aging,” she says. “But forgetting recent information, or important dates or events, or asking repetitive questions could be a sign of Alzheimer’s or other type of dementia.”

While there’s no cure, early diagnosis and support can make a real difference for patients and their families.

Push for answers, even if the first tests are unclear

Jack remembers the moment things shifted.

“I felt I wanted to really figure this out and wondered if it was really Alzheimer’s,” he says.

When Debbie first went in for testing, she passed a basic memory screening. It would’ve been easy to stop there, but Jack still had questions. And that persistence made all the difference.

“Some people may experience cognitive changes, but still pass an initial memory screening,” explains Dr. Lybbert. “We can do further memory tests and order basic lab tests or MRI imaging. We can also screen you for other things that might contribute to memory loss, such as sleep apnea or help identify medications that might be contributing to your symptoms.”

Debbie had a brain scan, blood work, and eventually, genetic testing. The results pointed to a rare form of dementia called frontotemporal dementia. It affects the frontal and temporal lobes of the brain and often shows up earlier than Alzheimer’s.

“The diagnosis was so devastating. It’s so permanent,” Jack says.

Why getting a specific diagnosis matters

There’s no one-size-fits-all approach to dementia. That’s why getting an exact diagnosis is so important.

“There are four main types of dementia, with Alzheimer’s being the most common,” says Dr. Lybbert. “Other types include vascular dementia, frontotemporal dementia and dementia with Lewy bodies.”

Each type affects the brain in its own way. Here’s how they differ:

1. Alzheimer’s is the most common type of dementia. It causes gradual changes in memory, thinking, and decision-making. It usually starts with forgetfulness, like repeating questions or losing track of time, and gets worse over time.
2. Vascular dementia is caused by reduced blood flow to the brain, often due to strokes or small vessel disease. Symptoms can come on suddenly or gradually and may include problems with thinking, focus, decision-making, or movement.
3. Frontotemporal dementia (which Debbie has) affects the front and side parts of the brain. It often shows up earlier in life than other types and may first appear as changes in personality, behavior, or language rather than memory.
4. Lewy body dementia involves abnormal protein deposits in the brain. It shares features with both Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s disease. People may experience memory loss, visual hallucinations, sleep changes, or movement problems.

Each type affects the brain in its own way. A specific diagnosis helps doctors recommend the right treatment and gives families a clearer picture of what to expect.

For Jack, having answers brought clarity and a sense of connection. He did some research and found a support group of people living with the same gene variant Debbie has.

How Jack and Debbie are living today

It’s been seven years since Debbie’s diagnosis. Jack and Debbie go for walks every day. They take things one day at a time and focus on what they can control – staying active, connected, and present with one another.

“Dr. Lybbert has been so sweet and gentle, and she understands the importance of taking care not just of the patient, but also taking care of the caregiver,” Jack says.

Dr. Lybbert encourages all of her patients, whether they have a diagnosis or not, to take steps that support long-term brain health.

Six ways to support brain health at any age

1. Move your body. Regular physical activity helps improve blood flow to the brain.
2. Eat plenty of fruits and vegetables. Antioxidants help protect brain cells and support healthy aging.
3. Manage your health conditions. High blood pressure, diabetes, high cholesterol, obesity, and smoking all raise your dementia risk.
4. Get enough sleep and manage stress. Sleep supports brain repair and may help prevent the buildup of plaques linked to Alzheimer’s.
5. Challenge your mind. Learn something new, do puzzles, read, or take up a mentally stimulating hobby.
6. Talk to someone every day. Staying socially connected matters more than you might think.

“It’s important to not spend days alone without social interaction,” says Dr. Lybbert. “You don’t have to be the life of the party if that’s not your personality. But engage in talking and interacting with people daily.”

You don’t have to wait for a crisis to speak up

If you or someone you love is noticing changes in memory, don’t wait. Talk to your primary care provider – even if you’re not sure whether it’s “serious enough.” It’s always okay to ask questions.

Early conversations can lead to earlier support and a clearer path forward.

To find a primary care physician or geriatrician in your area, visit intermountainhealth.org.